"The Prayer"

Hello friends and family,

I am beyond humbled tonight for the grace and the knowledge that our prayers are answered by a loving Heavenly Father.  I am so thankful for the blessings of the temple and how close the veil truly is.  I have been searching for an answer for months, I actually have been searching for many answers, but this particular one has been on my mind since the end of July.  I have prayed, fasted, prayed, cried, prayed some more, became frustrated at bumps in the road, and wondered why? on several occasions.

Today I have an answer, it is not how I thought it would come, or what I planned on it being.  It is better!  It will be harder and I am sure more bumps in the road our on their way.  But I know what direction I will take.  Will it be easy?  I don't think so.... Will I know exactly what to say or do?  I don't think so.... I do know that my Father in Heaven is with me on this journey.  That family members are with me on this journey, some here on earth and some in heaven. 

I posted the song "The Prayer" each word is very fitting.  I am thankful for the power of prayer and for the answers that wait until we are ready for them. 

The experience I have had is far to sacred to share, but I know He lives, He listens and He loves us!  I am certain of that!! 

As November comes to a close, I want to thank all of you for your prayers and support that you have so lovingly given me during the past couple of years.  The struggles are still there ,but are getting better everyday.  I am thankful for each of you.  I hope that one day I can repay the kindness shown to me by all of you.

Happy Holidays
Let's talk soon!


THE PRAYER with Lyrics_Celine Dion & Andrea Bocelli

I Am Thankful For The Thorns

Hello family and friends,

This month has gone by so fast.  I cannot believe it is Thanksgiving this week.  I am so thankful for everything that I have been blessed with in this life.  I have an awesome family, wonderful parents and siblings!  I have fantastic friends who teach me so much.  I love you all.  Words cannot adequately express how thankful I am for the Savior and my Father in Heaven.  These gifts are priceless to me.  I am one lucky girl.

This morning my friend posted a story that touched me so much.  There have been times in my life when I have struggled with things that have happened to me.  I know my Father in Heaven loves me and yet sometimes I do not understand why certain events take place.  This story has really changed my perspective and I would like to share it with you....


Sandra felt as low as the heels of her shoes when she pulled open the florist shop door, against a November gust of wind. Her life had been as sweet as a spring breeze and then, in the fourth month of her second pregnancy, a "minor" automobile accident stole her joy.

This was Thanksgiving week and the time she should have delivered their infant son. She grieved over their loss. Troubles had multiplied. Her husband's company "threatened" to transfer his job to a new location. Her sister had called to say that she could not come for her long awaited holiday visit.

What's worse, Sandra's friend suggested that Sandra's grief was a God-given path to maturity that would allow her to empathize with others who suffer. "She has no idea what I'm feeling," thought Sandra with a shudder. "Thanksgiving? Thankful for what?" she wondered. "For a careless driver whose truck was hardly scratched when he rear-ended her? For an airbag that saved her life, but took her child's?"

"Good afternoon, can I help you?" Sandra was startled by the approach of the shop clerk. "I need an arrangement," stammered Sandra. "For Thanksgiving? I'm convinced that flowers tell stories," she continued. "Are you looking for something that conveys 'gratitude' this Thanksgiving?" "Not exactly!" Sandra blurted out. "In the last five months, everything that could go wrong has gone wrong."Sandra regretted her outburst, and was surprised when the clerk said, have the perfect arrangement for you." Then the bell on the door rang, and the clerk greeted the new customer, "Hi, Barbara, let me get your order."

She excused herself and walked back to a small workroom, then quickly reappeared, carrying an arrangement of greenery, bows, and what appeared to be long-stemmed thorny roses. Except the ends of the rose stems were neatly snipped; there were no flowers.

"Do you want these in a box?" asked the clerk. Sandra watched was this a joke? Who would want rose stems with no flowers! She waited for laughter, but neither woman laughed. "Yes, please," Barbara replied with an appreciative smile. "You'd think after three years of getting the special, I wouldn't be so moved by its significance, but I can feel it right here, all over again," she said, as she gently tapped her chest.

Sandra stammered, "Ah, that lady just left with… uh… she left with no flowers!" "That's right," said the clerk. "I cut off the flowers. That's the 'Special'. I call it the Thanksgiving Thorns Bouquet. Barbara came into the shop three years ago, feeling much as you do today," explained the clerk. "She thought she had very little to be thankful for.

She had just lost her father to cancer; the family business was failing; her son had gotten into drugs; and she was facing major surgery. That same year I had lost my husband," continued the clerk. "For the first time in my life, I had to spend the holidays alone. I had no children, no husband, no family nearby, and too much debt to allow any travel.""So what did you do?" asked Sandra.

"I learned to be thankful for thorns," answered the clerk quietly. "I've always thanked God for the good things in my life and I never questioned Him why those good things happened to me, but when the bad stuff hit, I cried out, 'Why? Why me?!'

It took time for me to learn that the dark times are important to our faith! I have always enjoyed the 'flowers' of my life, but it took the thorns to show me the beauty of God's comfort! You know, the Bible says that God comforts us when we're afflicted, and from His consolation we learn to comfort others." Sandra sucked in her breath, as she thought about what her friend had tried to tell her. "I guess the truth is I don't want comfort. I've lost a baby and I'm angry with God."

Just then someone else walked in the shop.Hey, Phil!" the clerk greeted the balding, rotund man.
"My wife sent me in to get our usual Thanksgiving arrangement twelve thorny, long-stemmed stems!" laughed Phil as the clerk handed him a tissue wrapped arrangement from the refrigerator.
"Those are for your wife?" asked Sandra incredulously. "Do you mind telling me why she wants a bouquet that looks like that?"

Four years ago, my wife and I nearly divorced," Phil replied. "After forty years, we were in a real mess, but with the Lord's grace and guidance, we trudged through problem after problem, the Lord rescued our marriage. Jenny here (the clerk) told me she kept a vase of rose stems to remind her of what she had learned from "thorny" times. That was good enough for me. I took home some of those stems. My wife and I decided to label each one for a specific "problem" and give thanks for what that problem taught us." As Phil paid the clerk, he said to Sandra, "I highly recommend the Special!"

I don't know if I can be thankful for the thorns in my life" Sandra said to the clerk. "It's all too… fresh." "Well," the clerk replied carefully, "my experience has shown me that the thorns make the roses more precious. We treasure God's providential care more during trouble than at any other time. Remember that it was a crown of thorns that Jesus wore so we might know His love. Don't resent the thorns."Tears rolled down Sandra's cheeks.

For the first time since the accident, she loosened her grip on her resentment. "I'll take those twelve long-stemmed thorns, please," she managed to choke out. "I hoped you would," said the clerk gently. "I'll have them ready in a minute." "Thank you. What do I owe you?" "Nothing, Nothing but a promise to allow God to heal your heart. The first year's arrangement is always on me."
The clerk smiled and handed a card to Sandra. "I'll attach this card to your arrangement, but maybe you would like to read it first."

It read: "My God, I have never thanked You for my thorns. I have thanked You a thousand times for my roses, but never once for my thorns. Teach me the glory of the cross I bear; teach me the value of my thorns. Show me that I have climbed closer to You along the path of pain. Show me that, through my tears, the colors of Your rainbow look much more brilliant." Praise Him for the roses; thank Him for the thorns. God Bless all of you. Be thankful for all that the Lord does for you.

I am so thankful for all of the thorns in my life, for all of the blessings and for the lessons I learn from each thorn.  I am thankful for the crown of thorns that was worn by my Savior and for the profound sacrifice He bore for me.

This season and everyday my wish for all of you is this... Be thankful for the beautiful thorns in your lives and the lessons that teach us what love is really all about.

Happy Thanksgiving!


It is All About Love.....

Hello friends and family,

I hope everyone is doing well and looking forward to Thanksgiving with family and friends.  This is my Mom's year to have Thanksgiving at her house.  Everyone will be there except for Mike, Vanessa and the girls.  I really wish that they could be here as well.  It is hard when family is far away, I miss them and wish that could be with all of us!

I held my friend and neighbor's baby little Anna today.  I teared up holding her and thinking about how much love little ones provide to each of us.  She was happy listening to me talk baby talk to her and smiled at just about everything.  I love little Anna so much, Amber is like a sister to me.  I am so blessed to have such great friends!  Once again, I am so thankful for where I live, I have the best friends and neighbors here.

This month I have been writing one thing everyday that I am thankful for.  I really should do this every day of the year.  I am so blessed and thankful to the Savior for everything He has done for me.  I know he hears me and answers my prayers.

Over the past couple of weeks I have had such an interesting chain of events happen.  They have been very hurtful and somewhat difficult to understand.  I wanted to run away from all of it because I hate drama, however, that is just not what my Heavenly Father wants me to do.  Instead I was given wise counsel to "love more"  With that counsel and other promptings my feet are firmly planted no matter how hard the winds blow as I work with someone I care for very much through a storm that has had many twists and turns is the past two weeks.  I am thankful for the leaders of our church, for their examples and advice.  I know I could not be strong enough on my own without them and a loving Savior.  As President Hinckley stated "It is now time to get busy and get to work!"  Wish me luck!

I also have been sweetly reminded of the love that surrounds all of us during our lives.  In good times and in bad we are given each other, our families and friends to walk with us along the road less traveled.  ( Thanks Scott Peck for the book!)

I think about the atoning sacrifice that the Savior bore for each one of us.  It brings tears to my eyes and heart to think about the great drops of blood He bore for me.  There are no words to express my love for Him.

I have felt so much love as I have struggled to regain my health again.  I have turned a corner and then this week took a few steps back.  When I was walking out of the hospital I was near tears and when I go into my car I simply ask why is this still happening to me.  At that very moment in the hospital parking lot my heart was filled with such love and peace.  I know that I am supposed to learn something from all of this.  (I sure hope I learn quickly)  I am at peace knowing that I have a warm and cozy home to live in, people who love me and friends that are there whenever I need them.  It is really is all about love in this life and I am so thankful for every second I am here to learn.

I am thankful for this time of year.  I love the seasons and am excited for the snow!  I hope you have a great weekend and let's talk soon!


Oceans Of Tears

Hello Family and Friends,

I love this quote that I heard during the week, it states "There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. They are messengers of overwhelming grief...and unspeakable love.” - Washington Irving

This past week I have cried so many tears.  They have been happy tears, sad tears, tears of confusion and tears of concern.  I believe that it is healthy for us to cry.  Hilary Weeks wrote a song a few years back titled "Just let Me Cry" that song is everything in a nutshell to the feelings I have had this past week.

It is heart wrenching to see someone you have come to love hurting.  The hardest part for me is knowing that I would do anything to help them and yet can do nothing to change what they are going through.  I wish I had a magic wand to wave away all the pain that sometimes has a way of sneaking into our lives.

I love laughing so hard that you cry... (and almost wet your pants LOL)  I am so happy for the gift of laughter in our lives.  This week my sister Katie has called at just the right moments and turned a sad moment into one that we end up laughing about until we are sick!  It is nice to have those kind of tears!  They are always welcome here!

I have felt frustrated with my health this past week.  I am still so far away from where I want to be.  But then I am so far ahead of where I have been that I cannot complain.  I am thankful beyond words for my family, the church and all of you that have been so supportive of me during this difficult two years.  I am really looking forward to next year and praying that I can get back to normal... whatever that is.:)

Tears of confusion is a new one for me.  I will not go into any detail about this for it is a very sensitive subject for one of my friends.  I do pray for them everyday that life can be less stressful and more content for them.. It is very hard to watch life unravel for someone you love.  However, how blessed we are to know of the Atonement of Jesus Christ and the sacrifice that he bore for each one of us.

Tears are good for the soul!  I am thankful for them and for the release it gives our hearts.  I love you all and hope that you have a fantastic week!

Let's talk soon


A New Day!

Hello family and friends,

Well where do I begin?  This past week has been the longest I can remember having!  It seems like last week went on and on and on.... I am glad it over to be honest with you!  One thing I can say is that I will be just dandy this week if there are no big surprises or drama!  You know the saying.... Save the drama for your mama!  (Although my mom does not need any drama, so if you have anything come up don't call my "mama" call your own. :) 

I have decided that I am putting my Christmas tree up this week!  I love the holiday season and being in my home with Christmas everywhere!  It is a ton of work to put it up and always makes me sad to take it down.  This season I want to enjoy the holidays so up it goes a little early!

I will find out this week if I am going to be sequestered to my home during the cold weather.  My lungs are so compromised that the doc's are thinking that again this year... This does not make me happy.  I long for the day of getting up feeling great and going to work.

I have cried enough tears that I could be swimming in my own ocean of them soon.  When I say it has been a long week, it actually has been a very hard and distressing week.  Those of you who know me well, know that I wear my heart on my sleeve and am a huge worry wart!  This week takes the cake in that arena!  I won't bore you with details but I have to say that my heart has physically hurt with some of things that have happened.

My telephone rang at a little after 5am today, I called my friend right back and no answer.  It was startling and worrisome!  I have not been able to get an answer all day!  So friend, you know who you are, if you read this you had better call me you little bugger!  Remember my middle name "worry"

The reason I chose to name tonight's blog "A New Day" is that I am anxious to have one.  It is nice that we can press forward during times we do not fully comprehend. 

Well I know this is a random blog post.... My mind is a little all over the place.  I am thankful during this season for good friends and family.  For the gospel of Jesus Christ and for the knowledge that there will always be a new day!

Let's talk soon!